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July 8, 2010

Photo by Ian O’Neill
The night air breathed against her skin as the moon crept across the sky. Leaves rustled like children’s mocking laughter. A shiver ran down her spine.

“Come play with us.”

The chorus of whispers tickled her ear. She slapped at them as they giggled and faded into the distance. Eyes darting from tree to tree, she searched in vain for some sign that it was more than her imagination. Shadows stretched across the ground, flickering in time with the strobes of moonlight flashing through waving branches. She huddled further into her jacket and pressed forward in search of the trail.

A twig snapped to the left. Her yelp was followed by snickers from behind. Pain shot through her shoulder as a jagged rock landed at her feet. She bolted, running full force through the trees. Tears blazed trails down her cheeks as branches lashed out against her bare skin. Lungs burning, she caught sight of the trail ahead. A flashlight bobbed in the distance.

She sucked in a deep breath to get their attention, but a shove from behind sent her flying. Tumbling to the ground, she landed in an aching heap a few yards from the open trail. She fought to catch her breath as pain seared through her spine.

Fingers brushed the skin of her face and arms, caressing locks of her hair. Whispers too low to understand circled her.

“I don’t want to die,” she gasped.

Unified, the voices were clear.

“Neither did we.”

29 Comments leave one →
  1. July 8, 2010 3:24 PM

    Oh, that last sentence brought the chills! Quite a very good scary flash.

  2. Kelly permalink
    July 8, 2010 3:33 PM

    creepy! very nice!

  3. July 8, 2010 4:56 PM

    Creepy, creepy, creepy. That last line is chilling. Very cool story!

  4. July 8, 2010 5:55 PM

    Chills. The last line just opens a vein. Excellent story!

  5. Deanna Schrayer permalink
    July 8, 2010 5:58 PM

    Absolute perfect last line. I love a good ghost story, and this is just great!

  6. July 8, 2010 6:03 PM

    Another reason I hate kids: their ghosts are jerks.

  7. July 8, 2010 6:11 PM

    Oooh. Nice. I was actually expecting a twist, so when it didn’t twist and actually came to a dark conclusion, it surprised me. Kind of like a twist.

    I make no sense at all. But I really like your story.

  8. July 9, 2010 4:44 AM

    Now that I’m over being ticked at you for scaring the bejeezus out of me, I have just one word for you, my twisted sister: Brilliant.

  9. July 9, 2010 6:15 AM

    Short and sweet ghost story with a lot left untold. Very nicely done. And yes, I got the chills. 🙂

  10. Ian permalink
    July 9, 2010 6:49 AM

    Exceptionally creepy. I love that twist. You let me think one thing and you do another. Awesome.


    • July 9, 2010 11:47 AM

      Thanks, Ian. And an extra huge THANK YOU for letting me use your photo this week! 🙂

  11. Jax permalink
    July 9, 2010 7:39 AM

    You do write some wonderfully creepy stories! :)I look forward to your Friday Flash pieces. 🙂

  12. July 9, 2010 7:58 AM

    Very nicely done, as usual. I love her slapping at the whispers. And Ian’s picture is great too 🙂

  13. Jim Bronyaur permalink
    July 9, 2010 8:31 AM


    This is exactly what horror is supposed to be…

    And this story… quick, right to the point and freakin’ dark.

    This one will haunt me all weekend.

    Nice job!

    Jim <— My #fridayflash this week

  14. July 9, 2010 9:26 AM

    Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the awesome comments so far! I had fun writing this one. 🙂

  15. July 9, 2010 9:35 AM

    Speechless i’m lost for words !!!!!!!

  16. July 9, 2010 10:30 AM

    Fantastic! And creepy, so very creepy. The last line’s a killer.

  17. July 9, 2010 10:33 AM

    This was a perfect bit of flash! Creepy, beautiful, and dark.

  18. July 9, 2010 10:49 AM

    Love the picture…very cool story!

  19. July 9, 2010 2:27 PM

    Now, of course, we’re left to wonder how this all started and how many times it’s happened. It’s always nice when a story sort of opens up at the end.

  20. July 9, 2010 7:22 PM

    “Come play with us”. That was a creepy line. Great scene of the chase through the woods. Very nice.

  21. July 10, 2010 6:39 AM

    Intriguing ending. That was not expected and you added the macabre factor to give the story a gruesome twist at the end. I enjoyed it, and it was a haunting story. Well done! 🙂

  22. July 11, 2010 9:16 AM

    Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to comment and thanks for all the retweets as well. You guys are amazing.

  23. July 11, 2010 11:25 AM

    This is one of my greatest fears when walking in the woods, uh. My back was all tensed up as I read. Well done!

  24. July 11, 2010 11:40 AM

    Freaking brilliant!!! very nicely done.

  25. July 11, 2010 11:59 AM

    woah…. creep me out.


  26. Misty permalink
    October 21, 2010 1:10 PM

    You know what is creepier than ghosts? Kid ghosts. Nice work, sis!

  27. adampb permalink
    July 14, 2011 2:19 AM

    Nice and creepy. It’s the things that are left unsaid that make it powerful. Good story.
    Adam B @revhappiness


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